Sensory strategies for daily life with an autistic child

Our daughter’s sensory language

Our daughter has always had her own clear sensory language. There are children’s songs playing almost all the time. She loves Play-Doh and clay — she’ll make tiny figurines for ages — and certain soft cloths, the small handkerchiefs Asian families keep for babies. Most of all she loves water, and mixing colours in it; we let her play with hand paints now and then, and it delights her every time.

Haircuts and the dentist, on the other hand, are genuinely hard — sitting still for either is a lot to ask. Reading her likes and her hard-nos is what daily life is built on: lean into the first, prepare for the second.

Over-sensitive, under-sensitive — often both

Autistic children can be over-sensitive to some senses and under-sensitive to others, frequently a mix of both. A child who is over-sensitive to touch and sound might be overwhelmed by people brushing past them and by loud announcements — while the same child seeks out deep pressure or spinning, which are under-sensitive senses asking for more input.

That’s why there’s no universal checklist. The useful work is noticing your child’s pattern: which inputs they avoid, and which they seek.

• Avoiding might look like: covering ears, refusing certain clothes or food textures, distress in bright or noisy places, dislike of being touched.
• Seeking might look like: craving movement or spinning, mouthing objects, loving water or messy play, wanting deep squeezes, keeping favourite sounds or music playing.

Making home work

Small, cheap changes go a long way once you know the signature:

• Turn the volume down where you can — softer lighting, fewer competing sounds, a quiet corner your child can retreat to.
• Offer the inputs they seek, safely — for us that’s water and colour-mixing play, clay and Play-Doh, and their favourite music. Sensory “diet” ideas don’t need to be expensive; household materials work.
• Respect the textures that matter — if certain clothes, tags or foods cause real distress, it’s not fussiness. Removing the trigger is a legitimate fix.
• Keep a comfort object within reach — a favourite soft cloth or toy can regulate a child faster than any words.

The hard situations: haircuts, dentists, crowds

Some situations are hard precisely because they pile several sensory demands onto a child at once — the noise and buzz of clippers, an unfamiliar person very close, the requirement to stay still. A few things help:

• Prepare in advance. A social story that walks through a haircut or a dentist visit, step by step, can take some of the fear out of the unknown.
• Bring the regulators. Headphones for noise, a comfort object, a familiar song — whatever normally soothes your child.
• Lower the bar. A shorter, calmer visit that ends on an okay note beats a “complete” one that ends in a meltdown. Progress is cumulative.

When to get a professional involved

If sensory differences are getting in the way of everyday life, an occupational therapist can do a proper sensory assessment and suggest strategies tailored to your child. In Singapore, occupational therapy is one of the therapies you’ll typically meet through early intervention — our guide to autism therapies explains how OT and the others fit together.